In accordance with the principles of inclusivity, I demand that many punctuation marks be renamed.

.

The above shall no longer be referred to as a period.  This refers to a menstrual cycle which is imposed upon women by the patriarchy. Hereinafter it shall be referred to simply as EndOfSentence.

,

The above shall no longer be referred to as a comma.  This alludes to a coma which is a slight against anyone at all with any disability anywhere.  Hereinafter it shall be referred to as NeverUsedCorrectly.

:

The above shall no longer be referred to as a colon.  This evokes symbolism of the stomach area and is insensitive to anyone with any body image issue.  Hereinafter it shall be referred to as UsedInForms.

;

The above shall no longer be referred to as a semicolon.  This evokes an inherent state of confusion which is used by oppressors to oppress all people everywhere, all the time, in every way.  Hereinafter it shall be referred to as NeverUsedAnyways.

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The two punctuation marks above are the most heinous of all.  Their names shall not be mentioned.  They are associated with violence due to their hideous male defined names.  Henceforth, it’s use is outright abolished under penalty of committee censure.

Your compliance with this new language describing our punctuation marks is mandatory pursuant to the principles of inclusivity.